Life Currently | 14-08-2019

Recently, a friend/acquintance asked me a question I am still pondering on to date. I was busy sharing my (career) life details on my Instagram story (which I often do) – when she asked me why I feel the need to explain what I am up to, to strangers/anyone.

To be very candid, I had not brought myself to answer that before. I have been thinking about it a lot lately – and at best came up with the response that I do it for the young people I inspire – so they can know what I wish I knew.

Being Malawian meant, for most of us, that we did not have people in the public eye doing what we aspired to do. Adulting, for me, has been an extreme sport – because there was nobody sharing their life/career experience and explaining how they got it done. I have for long, aimed to bridge that gap for anyone who may need it.

I have always shared how I furnished my house, how I bought my car(s), how psychology saved me (in my book), how I make my food, how I relax and let loose, and plenty more (young) adulting advice.

Part of that, meant explaining why I love the person I love, why I drunk alcohol as a Christian, why I do not wear make up any more, my choices in spirituality, sometimes even why I wear a bikini at the pool/beach; among other things.

Introspecting, I have come to the realisation that I do these things for two reasons:

To justify, to myself, why I do things, the way that I do.

To teach, through being.

I am unsure which triumphs, of the two, just yet.

I however, do acknowledge that I owe noone any explanations for how I am/live my life.

I am seeking therapy, for my 25th year; to really sort through my thoughts, and process the life it has taken to get this far (because it truly has been a lot). I seek healing, before I enter the second half of my 20s.

I will continue to create and share, whenever I learn or read something; with the aim of teaching those willing.

As I embark on my 25th year in this world, I am done explaining my life choices to anyone. I will continue to be – and exist as candidly as I always have.