Hey loves,
Apologies for the long stretched mute mode. I was going through super major writer’s block. It was such an empty feeling that went on for months. I hope you’re all well as ever, and do let me know of your experiences of going through writer’s block yourself. Would love know know your ways of coping. Meanwhile, please do read this poem which (as always) is very personal to me.
|To the parents we forgive|
My childhood lasted for 14 years as it should be
6 years as it had to be
4 years as it turned out to be.
14,
Because I was always allowed to cry over-
Friendship and distance.
I was always allowed to miss home.
14, it lasted forever.
6,
Because beyond my believe in your perfection-
At 6 I had to debunk this madness.
You are more human than a parent.
And you could be the one breaking my heart too.
4,
Because most days I allowed myself to be wrong
To prove your rightness.
And still find way
To show you how to be a parent.
My childhood may not fit into a curriculum-
The little girl
Had a heart older than her age.
At 14,
She could miss home.
But at 6,
She was wailing adult cries
Over superheroes who were bad at keeping a home.
At 4,
She was crumbling on mistakes she never made-
Over fears that forced themselves into her.
For far too long,
I’ve celebrated your greatness.
Your over blazing love that torched my fire.
For far too long,
I’ve been grateful
For the life I got to live-
Without really healing the hurt I carry along.
The flickering childhood that was always shutting.
Your childhood was haunting mine.
I have to forgive you,
Not for my goodness’ sake
But because we want you
To be the parents we forgive.
Nobody gets to be a parent twice
And we understand we were your first trials
You were supposed to be the adults-
But you were once a child too
And bruises from there
Prickle us here and there.
The hurt sits on us
On days the storms are too loud
And we are reminded of the loud
That once made our home.
That still makes our home often.
May you heal from the childhood that haunt you,
As we forgive you for our childhood yours haunt.
Children do wrongs,
Children may not always have to forgive.
Maybe we are more human than children
To forgive their parents.
But take us as
Ones who are more children than human.
For it is through you,
That we know love
Either through hurt or otherwise.
For it is only through you,
We know love.
I know this,
Because before your imperfection
Stands the love
That keeps me from fleeing into thin air
From jumping cliffs
And cutting wrists.
We are your children you love.
You are our parents we forgive.
With gigantic love sealed with prayers,
Seku